06 September 2012

It's a Conspiracy!

Say what you will, but the universe proves time and time again that it is out to get me.  My latest encounter with the universe’s strange fixation on making my simple Colbert life miserable involved a contest that I had my Mommy enter me in.  The task was to submit a photo for the cover photo on Dog Milk’s facebook page, the theme being “your dog’s best smile.”  Naturally, my mommy submitted this photo of me looking dashing as ever, and one would think after seeing this, they would end the contest right then and there.  No need to look any farther.

However, fate would not allow it to be so.  For some unfathomable reason, the people at Dog Milk did not select my beautiful face to grace their cover, instead resorting to this poor schmuck as their September Cover Canine.

As if that weren’t bad enough, they announced their top 11 picks, and I....I, Colbert, most beautiful of all the dogs, was not on that list.

There is no other explanation except that the Universe is determined to ruin my life.

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